Episode #05: Mexican & Irish-American Illustrator and Author, Molly Mendoza

Episode Summary:

Welcome to this week’s episode of Draws in Spanish, where I chat with Mexican/Irish-American illustrator and author Molly Mendoza. Molly and I had a chill yet deep chat about growing up in the suburbs, blending their Mexican heritage with their Irish roots, and their relationship with the Spanish language. Aside from Molly’s cultural upbringing, we also talked about the ins and outs of their illustration work and what it’s been like working in the publishing industry. Join me on this week’s episode to learn more about Molly’s background and impressive illustration career.

Episode Notes:

If you’ve ever felt shy speaking Spanish, you’ll feel right at home with this episode. This week, I chat with Portland-based illustrator and author Molly Mendoza about how their Mexican/Irish-American culture influence their colorful and dynamic work.

Molly was raised in the Chicago suburbs before moving to Arizona in middle school, and eventually landed in Portland, OR for college. Since their college days, Molly’s illustrated picture books, written graphic novels, and painted murals all while continuously elevating their work.

Despite working with notable clients like Adobe and The New York Times, Molly’s not above making fan art! They explain that they view fan art as a fun outlet and a break from commercial work that allows them to connect to some of their favorite anime series like JoJo Bizarre Adventure. Molly even admits that their JBA fan art subtlety influenced their recent work for “Reflejoz en La Luz,” their recent duo show at Upper Playground Gallery in Portland.

These days, Molly’s focused on illustrating a new picture book, Jovita Wore Pants, and explains how they’ve built trust with Art Directors in order to approach every illustrated book differently. Listen to this episode to learn more about Molly’s Latinx influences, intuitive approach to illustration, and thriving career in publishing.

Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, or on your favorite podcast platform.

Topics Covered:

1. What it was like growing up in an Irish-American & Mexican household

2. Feeling self-conscious speaking Spanish

3. How Latinx heritage influences artwork in very personal ways

4. The struggles and realities of moving to a new middle school

5. How light and color heavily influence their work

6. Fan art as a legitimate art form

7. Working on their new picture book Jovita Wore Pants.

8. Practical advice for artists wanting to work in comics and graphic novels

Guest Info

Check out Molly’s latest work on Instagram, and their latest comic The Drake’s Sword for Shortbox Comics Fair.

Bonus Links:

• Shade of Fear: Horror Anthology Kickstarter

• SKIP - Molly’s Graphic Novel

• Molly’s insanely awesome portfolio

Special Offer

Listeners of the podcast can get a free, undated weekly and monthly planner inspired by the show from our website here.

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Show Transcript (Automatically generated)
Ep 5 - Molly Mendoza

Episode 05 - Molly Mendoza
[Captions are Automatically Generated]

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[00:00:00] Fabiola Lara: Welcome to [Draws in Spanish], a podcast that showcases the creative journey of notable Latinx, visual artists and designers. I'm your host Fabiola Lara. On this week's episode, I have Portland based artists and author, Molly Mendoza, Molly, who is half Irish-American and half Mexican published their graphic novel Skip in 2019.

Most recently they digitally released their comic The Drake's Sword at Shortbox Comics Fair. Aside from working on books, they've also created illustrations for clients like Adobe, the New York Times, and Wired. Their art is super vibrant, dynamic and full of texture, and I really can't wait for you to hear our chat.

Let's get right into the show.

Hey, Molly. Thank you so much for joining me today on [Draws in Spanish]. I am so excited to get to chat with you today. [00:01:00] I thought we could kick it off first by talking a little bit about your Latinx background and heritage, since that's a big theme of the podcast. Can you tell me a little bit more about like where you were born and raised and maybe your adolescence?

[00:01:14] Molly Mendoza: Totally. Hi, my name is Molly. I was born in illinois. Like my family, actually, they all kind of born and raised up in the Chicago land area. And my dad he's Mexican because my pretty grandma, his mom, she actually lived in Mexico, came here, met my grandpa, had a bunch of kids and you know, and then here we are. And then my mom, she is white and specifically like Irish American. They met in Chicago and,

[00:01:43] Fabiola Lara: yeah. Cool. So you grew up in Chicago?

[00:01:46] Molly Mendoza: I did not grow up in the city. No, but my family, they all did. I grew up out in the suburbs I grew up like in the Romeoville area.

[00:01:52] Fabiola Lara: So can you tell me more about like how it was living in this kind of by cultural household?

[00:01:59] Molly Mendoza: One really good [00:02:00] example would be sometimes we would split. Holidays to where, like there was one year where Thanksgiving, all of my dad's side of the family was over at her house in Romeoville. And when that happened, there's a lot of singing and performance and stuff like that. It's funny. All my dad's side of the family are very, very musically inclined, like, and artistic in that way.

And then I am. Very, I I'm the only one who can't sing or play an instrument, but I can draw. So it's interesting, but you know, there's just like a lot of, like, we would have that holidays there at the house, but then, and then we would do with my mom's side of the family, then maybe we would do like Christmas or something like that.

And with my mom's side family, I feel like it was a lot of like laughing and joking. And I mean, not that there wasn't laughing and joking at the other situation too, but you know, just like. It's totally different vibes, but both were very jovial and happy. It's just like, I don't know. It was, it was interesting because I [00:03:00] found that we rarely had moments where we were able to like mingle the two, but I did feel like the influences from both sides of my family coming in through my parents.

What they agreed upon and like what they brought to my life as like, yeah. To the household. So there wasn't too many instances where like the families, your relatives, for example, would like blend together the occasions, but there was still like this through line of joy and happiness.

Totally. Sometimes I wish that things could have like mixed together a little bit more.

[00:03:33] Fabiola Lara: Do you think that was just cause like the culture?

[00:03:36] Molly Mendoza: it could be. Yeah. I mean, I could be that I think also, you know, just could be like the way that people are going about their lives and things like that. But yeah, it's kind of like a tougher thing to talk about, I think, cause it's like, it's very conflicting cause it's like, oh, I love like both sides of my family and I love my parents, but you know, sometimes I could tell that people didn't click, but then sometimes I could [00:04:00] see when people really did click and yeah, I think that that, that could very much, well, it probably is very much like a COVID.

Difference or divider.

[00:04:07] Fabiola Lara: Yeah, there's something there. Yeah. Yeah,

[00:04:09] Molly Mendoza: totally. And as a younger person, it was like, it wasn't really something that I understood when I was a little, little kid. Cause we then eventually moved away to Arizona when it was me and my immediate family. We moved to Arizona when I was about to start high school.

So then it was like all that was over and it was like, okay, now I'm out here. I'm going to try to find my own way. And then that's kind of where like found family kind of became a big part of my life. I think. And then going on into Portland.

[00:04:42] Fabiola Lara: Right. Which is where you're at now, Portland, what was it like kind of growing up in the suburbs with your Mexican culture?

Did you experience any weirdness? A lot of the podcasts guests that have had so far kind of are in the cities where things are a little bit more naturally kind of [00:05:00] diverse. So that's why I wanted to bring it up.

[00:05:02] Molly Mendoza: Well, you know, what's funny is I think I was really, really blessed with the fact that. I was living in the suburbs.

We lived on this cul-de-sac and I want to say that there was. 60 kids in this one col-de-sac that we were on, like all the families had a lot of kids and there were a lot of different nationalities and races from household to household and all of us, we all hung out together and we all had a really good time together.

We had a family Palestinian descent next door. On the other side of me, we had, it was like a Italian family. And then there was like another Mexican family. And then there was a black household. There were folks down the street that were. And so like, there was a lot of kids, just the different races, cultural background by day.

[00:05:46] Fabiola Lara: That's really special because I feel like sometimes in most American suburbs it tends to be kind of, I guess it definitely depends obviously in the areas that you live in, like your, like you were saying, but that definitely I'm sure made you [00:06:00] feel. More comfortable as opposed to, for me, I grew up in like a really white suburbs.

So I always felt like I was just trying to fit in and blend in. Versus if you live near a lot of different. The cities and races and you kind of are more comfortable being yourself. Did you find that to be,

[00:06:17] Molly Mendoza: yeah, no, totally. I mean, I definitely felt really comfortable being myself because it felt like when we were all together, it didn't really feel like a question that came up like that question of like, what are you like that kind of thing.

It wasn't coming up as much, or like, I don't get you. Cause we were all just kind of like sharing with each other. We knew from our homes. And so it would be like, oh, like, do you want to come over really quick? My mom made this dish or like, Hey, do you want to come on really quick? We're going to watch this movie.

And you know, you just kind of get this, I don't know, in a weird way. It's like a, like a little drip feed of just like cool stuff from different people's lives and their cultures. And yeah, it was like really, really thankful for that. I don't think that, like I started running into. I don't know, I guess, I guess like that, like the questions of where do you align as I got older, then I felt like there was a lot of these questions [00:07:00] of who are you, what's your deal?

Like that kind of thing. Especially as I was like getting into middle school, kind of, because then, you know, you're getting into the drama of school politics and stuff like that and all that crap. And I don't know, I was really lucky that I'm so close with my siblings, because anytime, anything like that felt like there was a drama or like some sort of problem.

Like at least I had them and. They were really supportive and cool. And we always just kind of stuck together.

[00:07:25] Fabiola Lara: I feel like when you have siblings, then it's a lot easier to be yourself because you have like a crew behind you. Right. Because you mentioned that your dad is second generation. Did you guys speak Spanish in the household or what is your relationship with Spanish?

[00:07:40] Molly Mendoza: So my dad spoke Spanish a lot, obviously with his mom. Like his siblings and stuff like that, but we didn't really learn it. He would kind of give us some like, isms, like here and there, like just like little phrases and stuff. But it's interesting because if I go and visit my grandma, I understand Spanish really well.

So if she talks to me in Spanish, I would know what she was saying to me. It's just that I think I [00:08:00] never felt confident in speaking

[00:08:02] Fabiola Lara: Spanish, confident and comfortable. Exactly. To start speaking it it's like when you learn any new language, it's weird to start using it and trying to be normal about it.

[00:08:14] Molly Mendoza: Yeah, no, totally. I think like that was definitely something that I struggled with a lot was like, I wanted to be confident. I understand. I just, wasn't confident in me speaking it. So, cause I didn't want to, I don't know. I didn't want to sound dumb or something. I still feel like that sometimes I know quite a bit of Spanish, like not a crazy amount, but I know enough to get by and I really, really can understand it pretty well.

And the way I feel about that can sometimes feel the way that I feel about even by. It doesn't matter where you're just like, you're like, what is, I feel like there's little pieces missing or something.

[00:08:45] Fabiola Lara: I think it is like, so touchy, because there are some, I guess just people who think it's like, you have to know Spanish or you're lesser than if you don't know Spanish. I don't feel that way, but I know it's like a comment.

[00:08:59] Molly Mendoza: [00:09:00] Yes. Yeah. And there's a part of me that can understand that. Like, I can totally get that feeling, you know, like wanting to be safe in your space and stuff like that. But also I'm kind of, I don't know, I'm with you that I don't judge. I don't see it as a, like a badge of like, okay, now you're official.

Like, cause that that's not the way it works. Right.

[00:09:20] Fabiola Lara: And I think that there's also the flip side, which is like a lot of people and families I've known, they purposely avoid teaching Spanish so that their kids and the future generations are like more Americanized and don't have kind of. Associated shame with not being like of Latin origin and knowing Spanish.

I've seen that happen before where people are like, I want to protect my kid from having an accent or anything like that. So it's very complicated

[00:09:50] Molly Mendoza: and I've absolutely seen that before too. And sometimes I'm like, I'm like, is that what was going on? Really know, but, you know, it's, it's something where everything was happening in such like quick clips of my [00:10:00] life.

And I it's like, at least I have like the agency right now. If, if I to learn if, when to get better at it. And I think it's just, uh, getting over myself kind of a thing at that point, if I really want to learn it, I should just sit down and learn and also be more confident with it. But maybe in the past it was just kind of, yeah.

[00:10:17] Fabiola Lara: Totally. I speak Spanish. My family like forced me, you know, it was like, we're only speaking Spanish type of household. And I still feel really insecure about my Spanish to this day, just because I only ever really felt safe using it at family functions. I've never had to use it like with friends. Publicly or in a business setting, all of these other things, the insecurity of speaking the language, like can happen even at all levels.

Yeah. Because I don't want to like say something wrong or like say it and goofy way or something like that happened to me all the time. It was the worst. It is still the worst.

Or, you know, when like your family picks at you because you said it wrong or whatever. And it's like, [00:11:00] Do you want me to even drive because I could just revert, but I think in general, it's also really hard for parents to teach their kids Spanish. If kids don't want to learn Spanish because we're in the U S and you don't use it at school and it's not necessarily cool in any way.

So there's a lot to it.

[00:11:18] Molly Mendoza: I've been like encouraged by the fact that I see it. Maybe it's just because I'm in Portland, but I see like kids being, having a lot of personal drive to learn new languages and also they're being incentivized to do it too, which is really cool. But I also know, I have to remind myself constantly.

I'm like, I'm like, it's not like this. In the country, you're in a bubble right now and it's not even a great bubble. This is cold. Obviously. There's other issues here in the city, very obviously, but I want to maybe get to a point where it's really encouraged and it's, it feels good. And you're not going to be like punished or it's not like just

[00:11:51] Fabiola Lara: embarrassing.

Yeah,

[00:11:53] Molly Mendoza: exactly. I have a friend who. And she is from Mexico. And, um, right now she's living in Japan [00:12:00] and she speaks Spanish, Japanese and English. And so she gets the words like crisscrossed a lot. And then she gets like really embarrassed by them. It'd be like, mercy, like, please, like, don't be embarrassed.

Like it's totally fine. You know, like

[00:12:12] Fabiola Lara: how cool, you know, three languages. And I'm like, I'm like,

[00:12:15] Molly Mendoza: please. It's fine. Yeah. Like literally it's all right. You're doing great.

[00:12:22] Fabiola Lara: I feel that, I think we, you and I, we both have to give ourselves a little grace be kinder to each other the same way that you're like gentle with your friend and like judging your own Spanish levels.

And I think like if anyone listening to the podcast feels similarly, like just embrace wherever you're at with your Spanish or. If you don't feel comfortable at all, that's fine too. The one thing that I do, I don't know if you do this, Molly, just, I feel like my world is really English. Everything around me is super in the English language and I'm comfortable with it that way, but sometimes I miss speaking or hearing Spanish.

So I'll watch [00:13:00] Harry Potter in Spanish or not necessarily friends in Spanish, like shows that I. Kind of watch in the background that I already know what's going on. Cause I've seen it a million times and I'll just put them in Spanish just to hear it's totally different because it's usually like proper, like specific type of Spanish, but it is kind of comforting and kind of helps your ear like.

To stay in the zone. I'll also listen to sometimes like a Spanish podcast just to like, feel it around me a little more because it's not going to happen on its own. Oh my gosh.

[00:13:33] Molly Mendoza: I love that. That's beautiful. So sweet to

[00:13:36] Fabiola Lara: hear. I don't necessarily want to watch like a new show in Spanish. That kind of seems hard or something, but like, oh, watch what I already know.

And it's comforting. It's really funny to watch Harry Potter because they call her mini at neon. It's really funny. It's just like entertaining and kind of. Easy to do. I feel like at any level of Spanish, if you're doing it with stuff that you're already familiar with, if you want to it's there, you can just [00:14:00] turn off.

Well, yeah, that sounds great.

[00:14:02] Molly Mendoza: And also you, if you already know, like a lot of the dialogue too, like, I, I can think of a few movies that I probably know a lot of the words too. And if I watched it, then I'd be like, oh, okay. And then it was just like, helped me even like brush up on it, which

[00:14:13] Fabiola Lara: is. Yeah, exactly.

Brush up in a way. That's not like watching the news. Yeah. Which is like what I used to think I had to do. Like if I wanted to hear it, but going back to kind of your land next heritage, do you feel like it influences your work at all? It does.

[00:14:29] Molly Mendoza: It comes in in a lot of ways. I think a big part of my artwork is about interpersonal relationships and deeper, emotional connection between people.

And a lot of it is like kind of trying to tap into. The things that I remember when I was younger, because so much of that emotion that I'm tapping into is based on memory. And like what I was telling you earlier about like memories with my family, both sides of my family, but these like little moments that I would [00:15:00] see there were very, very passionate or intense or emotive and framed in a certain way and in a certain light.

And I mean, like literal light, I have memories of like being in my birdie grandma's place and like what the light looked like on the wall and those very, very personal memories. Yeah. And this is what makes it so hard to describe is because it's not anything that anyone can relate to one-to-one except for me, but maybe they can, maybe they can relate to like the nostalgia or like the feeling in a lot of ways, because like I moved and things were kind of separated.

Sometimes I feel sometimes like I'm out of touch. And so the same way that my work is about trying to be connected with other people and trying to reach closeness. I think that the work is also trying to find that. In myself with my identity and my heritage, my culture, it's all kind of coming through.

And it sounds almost sad, but like, say that, but it's kind of the truth. Just trying to find myself in my own voice and like be comfortable in it and be comfortable in [00:16:00] who I am. Like you were saying earlier, like it's okay. That I don't know how to speak Spanish or it's okay. That sometimes things were tough.

And then remember the times when it was like really, really good. And then I convey that in the emotion and in the tone of the word.

[00:16:14] Fabiola Lara: I feel like when I look at your work, I can see like the light and the shadows in your work come through in a lot of pieces. And then you mentioned that you vividly remember like the light in your grandma's house.

So I'm like, I can see, I can totally see the connections, but they are quite. Yeah.

[00:16:31] Molly Mendoza: And I think that, that's the thing that makes it so tricky to talk about, but I'm trying to get better about talking about it. I think in the past I would have just been like, I don't know, I just made it because it looks cool, but now I think I'm becoming more comfortable as an artist and being like, this is the way that I feel, or this is what I think, or this is what, this is who I am like, that kind of thing.

And in talking about it and like, I just turned 30, I'm still trying to figure these things out. Like I'm still trying to parse through. Happened in my past. And like, what's happened over time [00:17:00] and who am I now? Who was I, then

[00:17:02] Fabiola Lara: I feel like that's never ending work most of the time.

[00:17:04] Molly Mendoza: Totally. Absolutely. And I have a lot of work to do.

[00:17:08] Fabiola Lara: I feel like in general, the world agrees that like, we all need to go to therapy and we all have work to do so.

[00:17:13] Molly Mendoza: Oh my God. I would love to go to therapy. It's so hard to find a therapist, right?

[00:17:17] Fabiola Lara: Yes. I know. I feel you. I feel you. I like start and quit constantly on finding a therapist. You mentioned that you moved to Arizona.

Did you feel like a different connection with your heritage once you with your culture? Once you moved away? You know, cause you said in the, in the suburbs where you were living, it was like very diverse and there was a lot of ethnicities and races. Did that change at all when you moved to Arizona?

[00:17:40] Molly Mendoza: It did. Yeah, it did. Cause if I recall, I met everyone interestingly, on, on our street, they were all white and so it was a totally different, it was a shift. And I think I was also like just a little bit older than everybody on my street. So there wasn't really. And you want to hang out with, I think my little brother had a good time, like, cause he made friends cause they were his age.

But [00:18:00] honestly I only became closer with my sister. It's funny. Like when I was in middle school in Illinois, I would get up to a lot of trouble as a little bad. I wasn't bad, bad. I meant well, but I would do some bad stuff. And then, you know, Arizona. They felt like a puppy who like didn't have any friends.

And I was like, where are my friends? Like, I don't know anybody. I feel weird. And I almost felt like almost even more separated. But when I got to high school though, I met some people and all my friends, like my closest friends were Latinx folks. And we all clicked really well. And it was interesting because a lot of them also were like biracial.

I felt like we could talk about stuff together and like learn from each other and. You know, to share in some of their experiences.

[00:18:42] Fabiola Lara: Yes. That's so nice that you found like a, a new click. I feel like moving in middle school. Cause you said you moved in middle school, like before high school, right?

[00:18:49] Molly Mendoza: At the end of middle school, right before high school.

[00:18:51] Fabiola Lara: Yeah. That's so hard. Cause you're like, you're already kinda set in, you're not set in your ways, but like you're figuring out who you want to be, but you think, you know, [00:19:00] and then you move.

[00:19:02] Molly Mendoza: Oh, totally. And some of the kids in my classes, like when I was in middle school, they were, we went to kindergarten together.

I've known them forever. Yeah. And then all of a sudden I was like, oh,

[00:19:11] Fabiola Lara: it's such an isolating feeling that happened to me. I moved the middle of middle school. Then I moved again in eighth grade. Then I went again in ninth grade, then 11th and then in 12th. And it was just like, every time it was just like, I don't know anyone.

I don't, I, you know, by the, by the end I was just. Accepting that I don't know anyone and like won't, but in the beginning it's so like that first time that you move, when you go from like knowing everyone and kind of understanding the dynamics of like the school and like where you fit in at all and then get transplanted to like a new place.

And you're like, who's cool. You don't even know what's cool anymore. Like, everything's different. Definitely. When

[00:19:48] Molly Mendoza: I was in like elementary school and a little bit of middle school, like I would get bullied and stuff like that. But when I moved to Arizona, When I was in Illinois, like I, but I eventually, you know, asserted myself and like, you know, made [00:20:00] it so that like, Hey, like leaning along like that kind of thing.

And also my art in a weird way helped me make friends. Like a lot of connections I made was by giving people, drawings I've made of them. And you know, it went from being like, oh, like that weird girl to like, oh, she's just the girl that draws. She's the ice slick. And then. Arizona. And it was so funny cause like this kid, I think he was in eighth grade.

Cause like, yeah, I had to finish my eighth grade and then, and then I was going to high school and kept making fun of my nose. Cause it's just not like a typical standard nose. Like

[00:20:34] Fabiola Lara: it's really funny to describe on a podcast, your own nose,

[00:20:38] Molly Mendoza: my nose, everyone will go look you up

[00:20:41] Fabiola Lara: and was like, let me look at her notes.

[00:20:42] Molly Mendoza: Let me look at their nose please. Yeah, no. And I remember. This kid was picking on me. And then I was like, Hey man, like leave me alone. Like, you know, but then I was also like, my nose structure is like one thing, but then also it's been broken. So I was like, I was like, my nose is like this. Cause it was broken.

And then I think I said, I was like, it was like, do [00:21:00] you want a broken nose? And he was like, you wouldn't do it. And I just like, I broke his nose and then I got detention and then no one messed with me ever again. And Arizona.

So bad.

[00:21:10] Fabiola Lara: Wow. You followed through!

And then

[00:21:12] Molly Mendoza: my dad, they called my dad and my mom into the, to the school.

And honestly, they were just like rooting for me. And they, they didn't care that I was in trouble. They were just like, they were like, yeah, good, glad she did. That was like the last time I was bad. Like,

well, you didn't have to be any more after that. Okay, so just talking a little bit more about your work first.

[00:21:35] Fabiola Lara: Congratulations on your duo "Reflejos en La Luz" at upper playground in Portland. Is that right?

[00:21:41] Molly Mendoza: Yeah, that's right.

[00:21:42] Fabiola Lara: For those of us who couldn't make it to the show like myself, could you tell us what the show was about and kind of how it came to be?

[00:21:48] Molly Mendoza: The kind of short and sweet of it was we wanted to.

A show together know toast will Stephanie, like we both were kind of like working separately. At first, when we were both approach, we were both [00:22:00] approached and then we were already kind of going down our path of what we were thinking about working on without having met each other, having talked to each other, I just know that I had seen one of her murals in the city and it popped up on Alberta.

I believe that she did it with Portland street art Alliance and it was just. So cool. And I was like, oh man, that's artist, I'm going to be doing a show with I'm like so excited about it because the point of the dual shows was to showcase two artists at a time. The work could be. Collaborative in nature, they could play off each other, but really, it was just more so about showing two artists at once that was upper playgrounds initiative.

And that's how we finally met with the curator Lily. And she was like, what do you guys want to do? And we both kind of described where we were both coming from and we realized that both of us were playing with these themes of self-love and. Reflection and putting our selves out. If that makes sense, we taking our [00:23:00] souls and putting them out, or like, you know, being just entirely you.

And it was funny, like the way that we were describing it, but we were coming at it from like different angles, you know? So. And I hadn't even started painting yet. I just had like rough ideas and sketches, but she had started painting. So she was telling me like the color scheme, she was like, oh yeah, like I'm doing these pinks and everything.

And I was like, oh, well then I'll do pink. Like, I'll do pink with you, but I rarely use a lot of pink. So I'd love to play with that.

[00:23:27] Fabiola Lara: How beautiful you guys were able to like come together with it before it was even born? I wasn't sure how you guys connected. So it's nice to hear the backstory and like that you envisioned the show together. It wasn't just like. You bring your stuff. I'll bring my stuff. We'll put it in a room.

[00:23:44] Molly Mendoza: Thankfully. It wasn't like that. I mean, if it was like that, that would have been fine. I would have, obviously it still would've been an honor. I still would have been like, I'm so excited to show my work next to yours.

And it was funny too. Cause when we met up, we were just like joking around. It was. Beautiful firesides. And like, our work [00:24:00] was very passionate and we kept saying like, oh man, if I walked in on the show and I wasn't me, I would still think that this show is like so sick. Like all that kind of stuff. I was just like, kind of blown away that the way that it came together without knowing exactly what each other, where it's going to be drawing.

But knowing that we had the same intention. But just going about it differently. And so there was a lot of mirror elements and my work and hers, she had the spotlight. So then that's how we came up with the title,

[00:24:27] Fabiola Lara: the title alludes to, you know, and let loose. And then you were talking earlier about the light at your grandma's house. I'm seeing some themes here related or unrelated.

[00:24:36] Molly Mendoza: Yeah. Uh, I mean like light and color is really huge. I mean, weirdly I remember things in light and color. Like I remember the colors of certain days and I remember the feelings and. That's kind of the language that comes through. And it was really fun honestly, to make work that was using that same idea, but just a different colors of a different part of my life.

And the colors specifically that [00:25:00] I was thinking of was obviously I agreed to use paint and I want to use pink so that it would be collaborative. But what I tapped into was like pre pandemic, hanging out with my friends and getting ready in the mirror, or like, Getting all dressed up to go out to go dance or to go to a club or something I'm really, really bright on energetic stuff.

Or at least that's the color that I think of when I think of that time. Right. But then also having, cause there was like four and four for me, like for my pieces and four of them were like people together celebrating each other, but then the other four were people alone trying to. Celebrate or embrace themselves.

And those pieces are much more sad or like much more reflective and personal. And like, it's not about the way that they're dressed. It's about. Cause I think most of them are nude. It's just about them trying to connect with themselves and trying to accept themselves probably alone in their houses during the [00:26:00] pandemic.

So like that was kind of the feeling cause man, we all know like 20, 20. Shocked. And I didn't feel great at all. I felt terrible and I want to tap into both those feelings of like the way I felt before and the way that I. Last year and try to bring it forward in the work. Yeah.

[00:26:16] Fabiola Lara: I feel like you're saying that you remember stuff in colors and in moods, and I can totally see that come through in your work because your work is like so dynamic and it always has like so much energy and sets a mood in a way that.

Insanely impressed by because that's so hard to like capture a mood. Like that's another level and yeah. I just love hearing about how you think about your memories and your reflections. It's so interesting and yeah. Thank you for sharing.

[00:26:43] Molly Mendoza: Thank you. Thanks for letting me.

[00:26:45] Fabiola Lara: I noticed that you've been sharing a lot of Jojo, bizarre adventure fan art this year, which I'm not familiar with the shows. I am calling myself out at not familiar with the show, but my question is fan art is usually. Seen kind of as like [00:27:00] low level work, you know, it's like looked down upon generally. How do you feel about your relationship with it?

[00:27:06] Molly Mendoza: It's funny, like when I was in high school, I did a lot of fan art specifically for one piece, which is a different series, but I did a lot of one piece fan art and then I moved to Portland and I went to school.

And in school they kind of told you, like, don't do fan or like that kind of thing. So I didn't, there's like a stigma towards it and I understand like, Hey, the prompt was this. And the class is asking you to please try to engage with it because everyone else is engaging with it. Can you please participate in this way so that we can have a critique?

And I totally understand that, but you know, for stuff that's like, I think for like a style though, like, I don't think the anime or like that. Style is necessarily negative to portray in your work. I just think that sure. Like be intentional about, talk about why you're using it. Also acknowledge that there's a level of cultural appropriation there too.

You know, if you're not from Japan or. [00:28:00] East Asia. So that being said, I didn't it at fan art for really, really long time. And then again in 2020 happened and well, during 2019, I started watching Jojo. I'd never even watched it or read it or anything like that before my brother was like, I really, really want you to please watch this with me so that I have someone to live text while the new episodes come out.

And I was like, all right, fine. Cause I love anime. I do. I love it so much. And so. Went through with it, loved it, got obsessed with it because I just really liked the queer themes in the series, the colors, the dynamic poses Iraqi has like a lot of really awesome influences. And I just like, can't help, but love it and be drawn to it.

Especially some of his like later color spreads, like it's, I'm like, oh, I wish that I painted like that. Or like, or I wished my colors were like that. So it was very inspirational. And then like 2020 happened and my mind was focused elsewhere. I was focusing on. What was happening that year and the protests and trying to help with bail funds and stuff like that.

And trying to [00:29:00] just keep my head above water and trying to stay sane as possible to like living in quarantine and being at home and not seeing my friends and not seeing my family. And it made drawing, I don't know, it was hard to draw because like, I didn't know what to draw. Like sometimes I was just kind of feeling sad and I was depressed.

Like, I didn't want to do anything. There's a lot of things going on. But I still, can't not draw, like I have to draw every day. Like I it's my favorite thing to do. I know it sounds so dorky, but I really do love to do it. So I would just draw fan art. And it was interesting because it allowed me then to talk to people online who also liked the series.

And I made some friends that way, which was cool. Like I then had like a discord server where I talked to people and got me through like a tough patch where socialization felt really difficult to do.

[00:29:47] Fabiola Lara: Yeah. I feel like that's like such an underrated part of fan art is like, not only do you get to express yourself kind of like through this show, through like that mutual iteration for this show, but then you build community around the fan [00:30:00] are, and everyone's sharing their takes on it.

And it's just like so much more than just like, I think how people, some people perceive it as. Redrawing what you like, it's so much more than that.

[00:30:11] Molly Mendoza: No, it totally is because I think that people, they get very attached to the characters or the themes or whatever, and then they're, then they're just investigating it or exploring it in their own ways.

I think there's like a lot of stuff that can be bad about fandom because fandom culture could be kind of toxic. And I tried to steer clear of that stuff, but, you know, I was thankful for the friends that I made. I actually, even friends that I already had, like a number of friends that live in. New York.

And they they're all like comics folks. And we had a discord server where we talked about Joe, Joe. And we also talked about the Sopranos that we talked about. Like all this stuff that we were watching.

[00:30:42] Fabiola Lara: Yeah. It's like escapism, you know, it really helps in the, in the most like kind of depressing of times.

[00:30:48] Molly Mendoza: Absolutely. And I've actually kind of teetered off a little bit. I'm doing it just cause I have other projects that he had to work on, but it was interesting because I think that my fan art kind of accumulated. [00:31:00] The show that I finished with upper playground, because there are actually a lot of Jojo references and those paintings, they actually hit me up when they hit me up.

They were like, we would love if you have. Maybe did Joe Joe fan art for the show. And I said, I said, I'll find a way to put it in there, but I don't think that I'm going to, I focus on it,

[00:31:17] Fabiola Lara: but you still draw from it the same way that like anything can influence your work. Obviously, something that you're passionately watching is going to have an influence.

I love it. I love to like see artists, especially with. You've written books and you illustrate books. And I feel like there's a stigma with fan art. And so to see kind of like established artists, also having fun with fan art is like kind of a relief. Yeah.

[00:31:41] Molly Mendoza: So much more of them do it than you think. And they're usually just on a different account.

[00:31:45] Fabiola Lara: Yeah. It's like, why does it have to be guilty? Like we can just all share and just like, acknowledge that it's a thing and it's fine. You know, you're still an artist. Anyway. I know you mentioned that your, you haven't had too much time for fan art because you're working on other opportunities. [00:32:00] Can you tell us about any of that?

[00:32:01] Molly Mendoza: Oh, yeah, totally. I've been working on a picture books with Scholastic right now called whole veto wear pants, which is written by Aida Salazar. And I'm doing the illustrations for it. It's a kid's book, basically Hovey to wear pants is about this woman. Her name is and Aida is actually a descendant of hers and she fought.

With the revolutionaries to gain religious freedom. It's honestly a harrowing like intense story. And she went through a lot and this fight, she also. It's just like a really, really incredible figure. And capturing her story in these illustrations has been, I'm very thankful for the experience I've been working on it.

I've been very sleep deprived because I'm working on it a lot right now, but it's a cool story, but what's funny is, or it's not necessarily funny, but it's interesting about her. It was when she was little, she would touch her. She would tuck her dress into her bloomers to try and cause they always got 'cause she wanted to wear [00:33:00] pants. And by the end, she disguises herself as a man to be able to fight in the revolution.

[00:33:05] Fabiola Lara: Ah, what a beautiful story. I'm so excited to see you illustrate it. What's your process for working on these like longer projects and these like illustrated? Is this a picture book?

Yes, this

[00:33:16] Molly Mendoza: is a picture book.

This one is a picture book. It's tough, you know, because like I'm not the best sometimes with my time management, I think I I'm one of those people that fills my weeks with too many things, but at least with the help of my editors and my agent, I'm able to keep things on track, but the process usually starts pretty early on when you know, we're doing reading and.

Doing sketches for the book and trying to get a book map together, like, you know, like get a flow for the story. And these things are really, really rough and they, and honestly they go through so many iterations. Like I was actually looking through the files for the yesterday and I was just like being reminded of.

So many different sketches that we didn't use, or like so many different sketches that like we have edit and edit and change [00:34:00] and change. And I was like, oh my gosh, this book went through so many iterations, our versions of it. Before we finally settled on the ones that will take to finish

fascinating process, I feel like it has to be so kind of bizarre to see all the different sketches.

[00:34:15] Fabiola Lara: And I'm sure there was some that you love that maybe. Didn't they got Nicks and you're like, ah,

[00:34:20] Molly Mendoza: yeah, you kind of have to kill your darlings a little bit. And it can even happen like last minute too. Like sometimes like you'll do something and then it's like, actually publishing is tough publishing as a totally different world and I'm still learning it, but I do enjoy it.

I do enjoy making things for kids. Like I enjoyed making books for children and I'm happy to like, bring these stories to life, like with my artwork. Like it's a huge honor to be able to do that. It's also something that I have to juggle too, like, cause it's like, okay, I would make books for kids, but then I'll also make sexy paintings, like horror comics and like, you know, all

kinds of stuff.

[00:34:54] Fabiola Lara: I know that you wrote and you can put out your graphic novel, skip in 2019, and then you illustrated the [00:35:00] picture book. Freedom we sing in 2020. Do you have a preference for being like just the illustrator versus being the illustrator and author?

Would say,

[00:35:08] Molly Mendoza: I don't really have a preference. Skip was like its own beast.

And also finishing, Skip, I think was part of the reason why I only want to do fan are in 2020, because I was also very exhausted for that work. And also having to then do freedom. We sing like right after. But I found that writing on my own, which is something I do all the time, like with my comics and stuff.

Like, it can be a little intimidating. I think I must have like some sort of like self-confidence issue or something. Cause it's like we were talking about earlier about speaking Spanish. Like sometimes I'm nervous to even tell my own stories. Like, cause it, it makes me, is this good enough? Are people gonna understand like, is this too contrived?

Like what is this? But then working with someone else's texts, it's a very exciting experience, but it's also a very, like, I'm also nervous there too. Cause I don't want to miss anything in the text.. And I want to make sure that I'm true to the text. Anytime I've given somebody texts, I tell the editors, [00:36:00] I'm like, I'm not going to make this look like the other things you've seen because the other things you've seen of my work for other texts is true to that text.

I will draw the entirely differently or I will do something different. Here because it's what the text needs. If that makes sense. Like, I want each thing to have its own voice. Cause I don't know if I'll ever be that children's book illustrator that has like one style. I think I will continue to evolve and change based on what I'm reading and the author is saying.

[00:36:31] Fabiola Lara: Do you find that art directors are take that? Well, I feel like everything that you hear about art directors is like, they want to know exactly what you're going to give them, but maybe because you have a literary agent and you work. Your literary agency, is that different? Cause they kind of understand you as an artist, I guess.

[00:36:48] Molly Mendoza: I think so. I think like what happens honestly is I tell them, I'm just kind of like, just trust me like that I send them something and then at first they're like, I don't get it, but then, [00:37:00] and then we push it a little bit further and then I'm like, okay, what do you mean. Now, and then they're like, okay, you're right.

You're right. Like, yeah, it is good.

[00:37:07] Fabiola Lara: So you build that trust?

[00:37:08] Molly Mendoza: Yeah. I try to build my trust with them and you know, what's funny is like a lot of art directors, they tell me all the time that they're like, I really don't like get your work, but I love it. And I'm like, okay, like it's not, they don't get. I don't know how to describe it.

It's like, they don't know how I'm doing it. And they don't know like what it is. That's like making it the way that it is. And so sometimes an art director maybe doesn't know how to be like, can you put some more of those wishy things over here and do this thing over here? Because they don't even, like they say to me that they're like, I don't know if that's going to be the thing that fixes it.

Cause I don't know what your brain is doing right now. Or like, I don't know, like what, what you're putting together.

[00:37:42] Fabiola Lara: Like they have a hard time art directing it because is it maybe because your work is so dynamic and mood driven or something, they don't know how to like, explain what to get you to do.

[00:37:52] Molly Mendoza: Yeah. I think that, that's it. I think that's a little bit of what I'm saying. And, but, but we do, we develop a way of talking to each other. Like we [00:38:00] figure out the way that talk about the work in a way that like makes sense to both of us because man, if you saw the sketches I turned in they're atrocious.

They're like scribbled. I feel so bad, but it's still, but I don't know how to convey that in between. I'm learning how to like how to be more clear and be like, this is what I'm doing. But so much of my work is actually intuitive and it just happens the moment that I sit down to actually do it, I can map out a composition, but I can't necessarily tell you what it's going to look like or how the brushstrokes are going to fall.

I have no idea until it's done. And then I show it to them.

[00:38:35] Fabiola Lara: You have to like mock it up. Then it loses almost. It's like liveliness because you like posed it or something.

[00:38:40] Molly Mendoza: Yes. It's hard for them to tell me or for us to convey to each other, like, I'm going to do this, or can you please do that? Because we're talking the ideas in our heads, I guess, but I'm very thankful that my editors, they get me like our directors, they, they get me in, they're able to work with me and stuff and we get cool stuff done and it looks [00:39:00] really awesome when it's done. And it, they are a huge help in that.

[00:39:04] Fabiola Lara: That's like such a special place to be, to have editors and art directors on your side and kind of trusting you to bring everything to life, as opposed to like pushing you. And in ways maybe you, don't not interested in going, do you have any advice for someone who wants to start working in comics or graphic novels?

[00:39:24] Molly Mendoza: Uh, gosh, it's so hard because in a lot of ways, my experience making that jump was very painful. Because I was not paying attention to some things. I think like the biggest thing I can say is don't get too starry-eyed I really, really think that it's so important to read the contracts that you're signing, making sure.

We are being compensated well, make sure that you're getting taken care of. And I think that it's important to have an agent. If you can get an agent and these are like technical things, this isn't even about like the actual making apart, but, but you know, you need to [00:40:00] make sure that for the most part, you're going to be able to make it while you're working on all those pages.

It is so much work and I was working part time. And I was also having to chase a lot of editorial work and a lot of extra ad work to make rent while I was working on Skip. That was very difficult. I didn't sleep a lot. So don't grind yourself down over it and like compromising your health is like, Worth it.

[00:40:26] Fabiola Lara: Did you find that, like once you got a literary agent, you were able to kind of focus on publishing projects as opposed to taking on editorial work or ad work or stuff like that a little bit.

[00:40:38] Molly Mendoza: Yes, because now I'm finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel a little bit. Cause I think definitely when I got out of school, I, I signed yes to a lot of dream things that I was like really excited about without at least advising with other people, like reaching out to folks and be like, what do you think about this contractor? Like, what do you think about this [00:41:00] publisher? What should I expect? Like those kinds of things. I was just too excited and finally like kind of pushing through those choices.

And my agent now has a few book projects ready for me that I'm going to be. In these coming months. And it's nice to know that I have someone in my corner who made sure that I'm getting compensated well.

[00:41:21] Fabiola Lara: And so you can actually make it a proper living

[00:41:23] Molly Mendoza: until like these projects are getting dragged on for too long, because sometimes you think you're going to get done in a year, but publishing can be really slow.

And all of a sudden you're working on it for two years or three years and especially graphic novel. That's like three years easy. Like that's a long time and then you're waiting. When waiting and waiting for the other half of that advance. And then you're just like, oh

my God, uh, this was supposed to be a one-year thing.

[00:41:45] Fabiola Lara: And now it's a three year thing. Oh, that's so rough. Yeah.

[00:41:48] Molly Mendoza: You're like that pay looked good to cover those. Before, but now, now it's not, and I'm stretching, then I'd take on new work. So I still sometimes have to take on new work. And sometimes it is for financial [00:42:00] reasons. I mean, it's always for financial reasons, but then a lot of times I do it because it's work that I want to do.

Like I just recently was working with my friend, Adam for his street ed program where we are, we are working on a mural. Portland public school kids and teaching them about street art and then taking them out and doing public outreach and doing a mural. And we actually just finished our mural at the ethos center.

I'm just so proud of them. And I love painting murals. I like if a mural opportunity comes up, I just want to take it. And then I wind up being like, all right, here we go. I'm about to have one of the most brutal months in my life, you know? Cause I'm going to be working on a bug and painting a mural. I dunno sometimes it's my own fault.

[00:42:42] Fabiola Lara: How much of the work that you take on is for books or for editorial or murals or whatever else can, could you break that down?

[00:42:50] Molly Mendoza: I would say right now I take probably, I want to say maybe about half of my income right now is from books. And then I want to say a [00:43:00] good, like split of 25, 25 on murals and editorial, but it's seriously depends because sometimes the work will fluctuate and the prices will fluctuate. And so it might be that I took on one mural project that year, but it paid a lot, or it may be, I took on a lot of editorial work that year, or it just varies on like, who is reaching out.

[00:43:23] Fabiola Lara: But those are kind of like the three things that you gravitate towards books, murals and editorial?

[00:43:28] Molly Mendoza: Yes. And then I make my own personal work and paintings and stuff. When I try to do that as much as I can.

[00:43:34] Fabiola Lara: You just finished that comic for SP comics fair.

[00:43:39] Molly Mendoza: Yeah. That one that was really fun to do. It's really short. That's coming out on the first. Yeah. That'll be a digital release. Cause the fair is a online fair because obviously we can't really meet in short, but yeah.

Cause the world and also short box comics always was kind of a. The world, cause Zaina [00:44:00] always works with people from all over the place. And I can only imagine how hard it would be to get all of the people that she's worked with, like into one room anyway, you know, like, so this is actually really cool because we all get to be participating in something together.

[00:44:15] Fabiola Lara: That's awesome. You're taking on so many different kinds of work books, murals, editorial, plus your own comic endeavors. Do you have anything that's like kind of next on the horizon or that you wish you could do. Like a dream project.

[00:44:28] Molly Mendoza: I think a break would be nice. I would love a break, a real break. I think a residency would be really cool.

I would love to go somewhere and to work on something with maybe with artists that I haven't not before, you know, and just like be somewhere and be alone and just be told to work on something. Like that's a dream thing. That's an also very privileged thing to get to have, but I would love to, if I could have that opportunity, it'd be really.

[00:44:56] Fabiola Lara: Is there any way, like listeners could support you or your [00:45:00] work, if you want to shout out anything that you have going on. I know you mentioned the Drake sword, the new comic, but anything else?

[00:45:06] Molly Mendoza: So that again would be the short box comics fair, which is going to be dropping on October 1st. If you want to get the drug store, you should. And also you can get a bunch of other cool comics that will be there. That's the fair is really seriously awesome. And then another thing that you could. Meet with would be right now. I'm in this really cool anthology called shades of sphere. And we're trying to get it backed right now through Kickstarter.

So, if you look up shades of sheer horror anthology, there's some of the coolest comics folks are in this. And I think this would be really awesome cause it's like horror comics, but guided by color and tone. And they're specifically like very psychological and I think it's going to be awesome. Back that that would be pretty red.

[00:45:53] Fabiola Lara: All right. Well, that's all the time we have. Thank you so much for being on the podcast for chatting with me [00:46:00] about everything.

[00:46:01] Molly Mendoza: Oh my gosh. Thank you so much for having me. I had a lot of fun and it was also just really nice to get this off.

[00:46:09] Fabiola Lara: All right, everyone. Thanks so much for listening to this incredible chat with Molly Mendoza. If you want to see more of their work, follow them on Instagram at miss Molly, and I'm going to link their profile below. So feel free to go check it out. If you're looking to get organized with a cute little at home printable planner, then head over to [Draws in Spanish].com to get a free undated, weekly and monthly planner inspired by the.

If there's a Latinx visual artists based in the U S that you think I should speak to go ahead and nominate them by going to [Draws in Spanish].com/nominate. Now remember to hit subscribe. So you don't miss the next episode of [Draws in Spanish] with Philly based artists Monday. Like again, thank you and Athleta, Proxima.

Ciao.[00:47:00] .